Monthly Archives: April 2014

On Tarbiyah

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http://www.alkauthar.org/blog/11-mistakes-in-raising-children-have-you-committed-them-translated/

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Our child, our reflection

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I have to thanks one FB friend of mine, Susan Carland, for this realisation when she shared it in one of her FB updates a few months ago. I can’t remember the exact quote but the gist is that out of all the things in life, her children is the best reflection of her relationship with Allah. And masha Allah, as months rolled in this mothering experience of mine, I could definitely relate and appreciate her sharing better.

Just the other night, Zayd woke up in the middle of the night and doesn’t want to sleep back. He has not done this for quite a while and has been ‘sleeping through the night’ or ‘sttn’ in mummy’s lingo for a few months now and of course, his mummy is the happiest. And that one night, when I was so tired, and his dad was also so tired and he’s been back and forth back and forth jumping around the bed and I thought to myself ‘Why can’t he just sleep and give me some rest after all I have done for him during the day?!’ And at that moment a new thought crossed my mind – Astaghfirullah, this must how it’s been like when I was ‘misbehaving’ and being ungrateful to Allah.

Allah has done everything for me, protecting me from all sorts of harm, known and unknown to me. Allah has guided me when I was lost. Allah has provided for me food, shelter, love, and all things nice in life – and yet, I am still from time to time became ungrateful and ‘misbehaving’.

This thought made me realised that indeed, even when our child is testing our limits – it is still a huge blessing from Allah. Allah reminded us of our own behaviour towards Him through the actions of our child. We can choose to be mad at our child, and be angry at them, which resulted in angering Allah for Allah do not create a child for us so that we could be raging mad at them – or we could take that opportunity to reflect on our own relationship with Allah, practise patience, and keep on loving our child.

Alhamdulillah for this reminder. And to my baby boy, mummy is forever thankful to you for always making me reflect upon my relationship with Allah. Uhibbukafillah my boy 🙂

Kahlil Gibran – On Children

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Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwells in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies
so He loves also the bow that is stable

10 months

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You are 10 months now and are starting to really develop your own personality! In some ways, you are a little bit like me. One determined ball of energy. You screamed with your whole might, you climbed over things with a lot of gusto, basically you do things all out – just like mummy. But you are also calm and content like daddy. You can play on your own without needing much attention or assistance from mummy and daddy. I am sure you will keep on developing your own personality that is neither like mummy’s and daddy’s and that is going to be so interesting for us to see! You are also starting to be a bit more sociable and loves to play with your cousins. You love watching the videos of us doing silly faces. You are such a good eater. You basically can eat everything that mummy shoved at you. To this day, you have tried salty food (just a little bit), spicy food (nasi goreng – you keep pestering mummy so mummy had to give you some!), you love your fruits; bananas, kiwis, oranges, dates, grapes.

I can’t believe in 2 months time you are going to be 1. Time really do fly when you are having fun! And raising you, my cheeky little boy, is just a loooot of fun! 😀